Or, maybe it was the corncob you were smoking.
Just because my hands are smooth, doesn't mean I'm not a real man.
This guy came into my work and introduced himself to me. He immediately shook my hand. First off, I don't like to shake hands. Its an old tradition showing the person you have just met that you do not have a weapon, like brass knuckles or something. But hell, you could have a joy-buzzer, or you could have just wiped your ass with your bare hand and now giving me some type of hepititus stain. Seriously, we should probably hug. That's way more affectionate and endearing. It also says you are comfortable with yourself and not afraid to pull a man in closely. This hand shaking bullshit is for boxers. I'm not gay, I haven't even seen brokeback mountain, but I'm not afraid to hug another man.
Back to this guy.
He was like a contruction worker or something, here to work on some equipment in the office. Anyways, the guys shakes my hand. Now, I'm a pretty masculine type of guy. I usually have a tooth-pick or a corn-cob pipe dangling from my mouth. I also don't shave my neck, so I have stubble around my collar. I also have a pretty macho haircut, short and tight.
Well instinctivly he sizes me up as a wuss, cause I have really soft and smooth hands. He gives me like that once over look, like "you fuckin' pussy, you never worked a hard day in your life. You got hands as soft as rose petals." I am concerned of my paws because, well, I jack off a lot. So when I go bench press or do concentration curls I always wear nice gloves.. usually Joe Weider gloves. He was a real man.
My hands are smooth because I was my dishes with a softening gel that is tough on dirt but easy on the skin. Washing dishes could really damage your skin. You keep your hands submerged under hot water while dealing with grease and various oils/fats/starches.
Did I mention that I beat off a lot? Cause when I jerk my cock, I don't use a lube, instead I use a moisturizer. This softens up my hands even more, especially my right hand. It also does wonders for my penis. My penis is kept pretty silky smooth, so on that rare occassion I do get to share it with a woman, she will be impressed with my well kept meat pole.