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Hey Ladies, don’t have baggage? Do you want some? - 37

Has your dating life been safe, but boring?
When you and your friends gather together and tell “war stories” of bad relationships, do you feel left out or have to make up some stories?
Do you go to a shrink and have nothing to tell them?

We’ll here I am ladies…the solutions to your problems.

I’m 37 and a struggling artist. I will probably continue to be so for the rest of my life or hit it really big and then dump you like a day old donut.

If you believe in God or a higher power I will pick at your beliefs until they look like Swiss cheese undermining the very base of your well being while introducing you to the bleak ultra-reality of my life.

While caring and considerate, I will slowly break down your emotional defenses; become your best friend and lover, while at the same time never fully committing to you completely eventually turning you into an emotionally needy and unsatisfied pile of mush.

I will rock your world sexually and take you to new heights you never thought you would go only to become disinterested later and spend too much time downloading porn from the internet, leaving you like a junkie trying to recreate your first high.

If this sounds like something you’ve been missing, drop me a line with a pic. I will write back if you look suitably innocent for me to screw up.

Peace.

PS I’m a messy person too so you’ll be cleaning up the apartment as well.