No Teeth, No Problem
Toothless CockSucking Freak.Wants to Suck You
Looking for pnp/freaky boys who want to get NASTY.
Im a Bottom , Looking for Tops who want to unload in one of my holes
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May 31, 2006
May 30, 2006
For pics, refer to the side of a milk carton.
Desperate to move to West Hollywood... - 23
23/Female/Petite
...and no, you WON'T be disappointed.
I would do ANYTHING to move to West Hollywood and live the life I've been longing to live...Vegas is a bust and I'm looking for better options.
What can you do to help me out?
May 29, 2006
Only in L.A.
CLOSETED MODEL OR ACTOR? JUST NEED A BJ NOW & THEN? - 35
Let me help you out. Total no strings, nsa head for hot actors and models who are closeted, married, bi, on the dl or just need to release some stress. Girlfriend won't? I will. Hosting at my place in Weho. Work at home, so available in between your auditions! Decent looking guy on this end, stocky build, blond/blue eyed all american guy next door w/facial hair.
Cum by sometime, no one ever needs to know. I'll be your own private cocksucker.
May 28, 2006
They Bite and Scratch and Scream All Night
Metrosexual seeking Swanky Hipster Lovin - t4t - 28
I enjoy listening to the Cure and the Smiths, wearing peg-legged acid wash jeans, I have a swoop hair cut and I always wear a striped shirt. I'm looking for an 80s lovin, emo, skinny, bike riding (I mean a real bicycle), swing dancing, heroin chic homosapien to share my days with. I like to pretend to be depressed sometimes. Well actually most of the time. Did I mention that I look like I'm on heroin? Do you like home-made comic books? Do you read Vice Magazine? Coffee and lots of cigarettes? Androgenous sex? If so, don't be shy. I won't bite, because I lost all my teeth from methamphetamine use. But really, I do have teeth. Just email me, baby, yeah.
May 27, 2006
You're Dashing in Your Prep Knickers
Preppy? White trim smooth 18-30? Ever go to a prep school?
I'm into smooth, trim, white guys under 30 y/o tall or short, but slim and preppy, clean cut or surf. I'm into guys who are preppy enough to wear or like 2-toned black and white or brown and white or blue and white saddle shoes. Did you wear them in prep school? Fraternity?
See pics below. They are the ultimate traditional, classy symbol of all-American preppiness. If you are into dressing that way or if you want to know where/how to buy them or wear some that I have, email your pics to me with your age, height, weight. I can talk on the phone about going out, a date, just meeting, or whatever. I'm very close to UCLA but USC, LMU, SMC and Pepperdine guys or non-students are very welcome too. I'm 6', 188 lbs, hzl/brn, 43" chest (shaved) 33" waist, white, no drugs/smoke, HIV neg.
May 26, 2006
Does a rap sheet full of P.C. 647 (b) convictions count as a c.v.?
MEDICAL STUDENT, 32, seeks woman around same age to marry, one who is a self-contained thinker with sense of humor and of absurd, has ambition to leave world better place not only by bearing children; who can love without becoming dependent, cherishes poetry, demands physical exercise, rejoices in life. Send personal essay and c.v. to [redacted]
May 25, 2006
Baby, I'll Be Your Extended Warranty
Obedient, devoted asshole for your cock - 27
Looking to set my ass up in your bedroom as an appliance with the sole purpose to be ready for you whenever you need to bust a nut.
It is a no strings set up for the right creative guy who can follow the user's manual, keep it clean and anonym, and at the same time has fun with his appliance, creatively uses it and handles it as such.
I want to find one fun owner to my machine. He could call almost any time he would want to use a machine and have fun with it. I am conducting test runs right now, but really serious about this issue. I want to have tonns of fun, providing fun for you.
The machine would arrive on time, set up and wait for you to use it. No instructions needed, no talking needed. You touch it whenever you want, you fuck it whenever you want, you ignore it whenever you want.
Not looking to be part of your life other than standing on the side like an appliance and waiting.
You don't have to turn it on. It is warm and inviting all the time and you do to it whatever you want.
I would like to be a fuck machine of someone for a few times or even regularly when he feels like he needs to use a fuck machine asshole.
The set up is easy, but if it makes you uneasy, then you shouldn't answer this ad, because it is not a fraud, it is a legitimate sexual fantasy that I take seriously. I only want to do it if it is played out exactly as it is described here.
I would be your fuck machine set up in your bedroom that you could use when you want.
When you feel like wanting to use the fuck machine, you could call me a let me know when to be at your place setting up the machine. You would be already at home, hiding in one of the rooms for anonymity. You would leave the front door open only so I could get in. Don't worry, as soon as you hear I get in your bedroom, you could come out and lock the door and check that everything is clear. I will not do anything wrong or steal or anything. I will get in your bedroom, get naked and kneel in front of the bed with my upper body resting on the bed and my ass poking out, and I would pull the cover over my head and back, so only my ass would be visible. It is important that your bed should not be waist height. It only works if you have a low bed or sofa. I might bring some poppers under the cover for myself just to make matters and happenings easier... The machine needs head cleaner and oiling from time to time.
From that point, I would wait there as a machine.
You could come in the bedroom, walk around, have a beer, watch TV, take a shower, read the paper have a cocktail... I would stay there waiting, quiet.
Then when you are ready and feel like you want to get off, or just wanna have a little fun, you could get behind me and do with my ass (your fuck machine) as you please. You could pet it, you could stroke it, you could lick it, or if you want, you could stick your cock in and fuck it, or cum on it and lick it off. Then when you came, you could go back to watch TV, read the paper, drink a beer, lay around for like about 5 minutes. Then leave from the room, go back to the one where you were hiding when I came in, let me dress and leave with the prototype... And when you want to use your fuck-machine again, just call me again and do the same thing the same way.
I am thinking about upgrading the fuck machine with a suck machine that you could use under the cover, lifting it up and entering with your cock sidewise... I will work on this addition in detail later.
Here, you can see a picture of the model I am offering to you in your home. If you like it, you could order one.
There are some restrictions though. You must be healthy, HIV-, stdfree and completely follow the instruction of the use of the fuck machine.
Since the machine has to work for everyone, you do not have to disclose any stats or information about yourself, nor do you have to send any pics. Though for calibrating purposes, it would be nice, if you could provide a picture of your member you wish to use in the fuck machine and give me exact measurements on it. As I have told you, it does not matter, I just have to know to calibrate the machine right for your size. If you would like to try this model, just send me an e-mail and we will set up the installation as soon as possible, as soon as it is convenient for you.
* this is in or around Chatsworth
May 24, 2006
Year 75 of Solitude (and counting)
‘In the end it is impossible not to become what others think you are’ From The Ides of March att Julius Caesar; in Memories of my Melancholy Whores, by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. At 75 I find that I can bear witness to this truth: but, honestly compels me to wonder if my journey has been heavily honed by transference/countertransference phenomena in my erstwhile consulting room. Can someone out there persuade me that it was all worth the effort? A reply from Señor Márquez would be great, but I’m prepared to settle for comforting another funny, grumpy old man.
May 23, 2006
Isn't Boy-Chick A Band Out of Russia?
do you get mistaken for a pretty girl? - 36
you have pretty, naturally femme looks, and get mistaken alot for a chick...whether you try to or not), I'd love to chat with you. str8-acting white guy here, interested in boy-chick.
May 22, 2006
High Apple Pie in the Sky Hopes
I'm gonna break the rubber inside you... - m4w - 29
...and you're gonna love it.
You are secretly in love with the idea of feeling the warm rush of sperm filling you, even though your rational side makes you tell your lovers to put on a condom.
Is this you? Then you are my kind of girl.
What do I have to offer: a thick 8 to put somewhere oh-so-tight... wheels if you you'd rather I come to you... a warm bed if you want to come to me... a promise to lick before I stick.
No holding back, no pulling out - maximum intensity sex! Can you handle it? Tonight or tomorrow.
May 21, 2006
Is That American Apparel?
Give me wedgies - 21
21 5'8 140ish
dominate me with wedgies, maybe some light spanking, wrestling. we'll see what develops.
May 20, 2006
Even for One Hand, That's a Lot of Typo's
prostate masage,65 for our - m4m - 33 (milpitas)
do you need a prostate masage,full relajation home masage I am 510 175lb latin 33yo 7.5uncut, live a mesege, if I am in the othere line.I will be back to you as soon is posible..elso full boddy masage...call for one apoimant: [redacted]
May 19, 2006
Insert "Milk-Bone" Joke Here
SEARCHIN' for THUG BONE AND LOAD, 60 bones for your bone - 40
Serious deepthroating cumhungry need for later tonite for a thug to use my throat to get his nut. I'm 40 good looking white dude work out and healthy brn hair and hot blue eyes. I hook up with str8 and bi dudes who dig getting blown for bucks 'cuz it's no bs and flat out easier than cruising. looking for later tonite my place. dick pics gurantee my response. you can keep your face private can even hook up an anonymous blow job for ya if you like, just gotta have the attitude trash talk and dick of a thug who preciates mad skills cocksucker. can provide 420, or vics if you dig those. not lookin for back and forth emails, need a way to check out your meat and then get in touch with very little trouble. could be a regular source of extra bones for you.
May 18, 2006
Gravity, or Something Serious
Brent - skydiving 4-23 - w4m
It felt great being strapped between your legs for the tandem jump. I love a big, strong man with a firm grip who can handle me. Did we have a moment at 13,500 feet?
May 17, 2006
Hope You Like Spelunking
CAVERN for the big ones... - 50
Older masc. girly guy with a creammy white ass likes your quivering throbbing sensations! Must travel. This is for now. Age/race open. Neg/UB2. If you send me your picture, I'll send you mine.
May 16, 2006
A Narrow Escape
YOU SUCK!!! - m4w
you ran off and killed our chemistry because I didn't give you enough BULLSHIT reasons why we should have sex! what ridiculousness! grow up. What stronger connection will you ever have with a complete stranger than the connection we had ... until you ruined it. good luck finding it again. M
May 15, 2006
I Don't Cut Hair But I'd Like To Suck Your Cock
Need Haircut
Don't know if this will work but I figure its worth a shot. I'm a 32yo white bi guy... very tall and slim, masculine, not bad looking. New to LA from the east coast. I'm working 70hr weeks right now, have today off and really want/need a haircut... Tried a couple of places nearby, either closed on sundays or booked solid or ridiculously expensive.
Perhaps someone nearby (who is a stylist) could help me out? I'm very laid back and chill and open to whatever. We can do it in the nude, or I can throw you some cash, or however you want to work it. Email me with your idea, location and a pic would be cool. It's possible for me to host but I'd definitely prefer to travel. I'm attaching a couple of pics. PLEASE be for real... I'm looking for a haircut! Don't make me sort through a bunch of "I dont cut hair but I'd like to suck your cock" emails. Please read that last sentence again before emailing me. Thanks, peace out.
May 14, 2006
For God's Sake, Phone Your Mother
easygirl4fuckbuddy - w4m
43 year old with stretch marks after childbirth never done this before but had enough of partner negelcting me.
maybe i am too old i dont know but doe's life stop here???
anyway nervous as i have been with partner for over 21 years should i just accept the way it has to be?
no offence white males only
May 13, 2006
We'd review that colonoscopy chart again.
X-rays, blood tests, EEGs, ECGs
...lung function, barium, bone density, colonoscopy. Doctors don’t know what to do with me. Medical enigma (M, 33). Confounding science and all the staff at Streatham Hill Burger King since 1997.
May 12, 2006
And Afterwards, We Can Grab A Bite
MY HOT MOUTH AND TONGUE YOUR DIRTY RIPE HOLE, PISS AND CUM LOADS - 38
IF YOUR HOT AND AN INCHARGE ALPHA STUD.........MY MOUTH IS YOURS TO USE A ABUSE AS YOU WANT..............
If your a hot, lean jock/ bi-guy/str8 incharge kinda guy and you want to make/use a hot worked out masc good looking guy to serve you as you want -as long as you want it...maybe use me to be your personal toilet/service guy..................im a hot worked out lean masc, jox..5-11, 155, 38, vgl
hot guy ready to submit, worship and service your nasty needs..completely....my mouth and tongue are yours to use and train to take it all as you want it....your incharge to use my mouth ....make me lick out your dirty ripe shit hole....lick it and clean it as you jerk off..then if you want, use my mouth to eat the shit out of your stud hole...all of it and lick your hole clean like toilet paper.....then turn my mouth into your urnil to take your piss loads... and when your ready, bust a huge load of semen in your toilets mouth .....then leave........just like your use your toilet at home................................you be hot, worked out, lean...ready to take charge..
May 11, 2006
Honk and Pass
Clowns Looking for a Gang Bang - mm4ww
We are a group of circus clowns looking for a female to share. We have done this many times before, but lately it seems that all the women on this site want a "sugar daddy" or be paid to fulfill their fantasies. If you are a young college student looking to have a wild experience but are tired of the drunken frat boys and soldiers.....we can help you!!!!! If you are a MILF and tired of the boring day to day of you husband and his brother.....we can help you!!!!!! If you are a closet slut just dying to get hammered hard and used.....WE CAN HELP YOU!!!!!!!
We are a safe and sane group of current and former circus clowns that are experienced in group settings and in the art of pleasuring women and making their dreams come true. Some of us are of "normal height and weight" and some of us are midgets and really fat or really tall. We are also very skilled at baloon tricks and getting in and out of very small cars.
A few of our successful experiences:
1. A group of 6 of us gang banged a goat over and over til she was glowing.
2. We had a female be our "entertainment" at a Superbowl party where she served drinks in the nude and serviced the guys as they needed it. She liked it a lot and brought two girlfriends from GMU over with her for a poker night. Both parties were great because we didn't have a TV at the Superbowl party and none of us knows how to play poker.
3. One girl wanted a group of 7 one at a time. She had a room with a tiny closet and all of the guys were able to fit in at the same time with her and nobody got their make-up distorted. Some of us went back for a second round. She ended by having us all cum into a giant cup all night and she drank the cup at the end. She had so much fun and liked the cum so much, she came back for a larger group (no sex, but a giant bukkake circle) to get drenched in cum and clown make-up.
4. One woman wanted one guy every 3 days. After 3 days she switched to the next guy. She did not know who she was going to get, just an envelope with a name and a number so she could move on. She went through all 12 of us.
What is your fantasy ladies? What can we do for you? Bonk, Bonk.
May 10, 2006
Perfect For That Drowning Fantasy
Blast After Blast of Hot Piss - 25
You're on your knees waiting---you think this
is going to be easy---then you get hit with a
hot blast of piss---then another, and another,
another---it's just too much.You think I'm gonna
stop, but I just keep pushing out wave of
wave of piss. You think you
can handle this? Then you host. I've gotta
pee like a fuckin' racehorse. For now.
Serious replies only.
May 09, 2006
...and Ann B. Davis as Alice
Cpl lookin for the final piece of the puzzle - mw4w - 29
We are a very happily married hispanic mixed couple (he's 29 she's 25) who is looking for that special woman to complete us. Were not looking for a hook up or a f*ck buddy, but instead an equal partner that we can share our life with in a committed long term relationship.
We have children so obviously that shouldn't be a problem. Drama queens and flakes need not waste our time or yours. Please email us back with a little about yourself and a way to get ahold of you and we'll talk more
thanks for takin the time to read this
May 08, 2006
With a Mallet?
Meat Tenderizer - 46
Let me tenderize your tough hard meat with one of my fabulous cum eating blow jobs.
May 07, 2006
And, if you secrete royal jelly, he'll eat that, too.
I want a young guy to piss in my mouth and fart in my face
Generous here, looking for a young guy who'd be into feeding me your piss, letting me suck you off and eat your cum, and letting me lick your ass out. Fart in my face if you want while I do it. Feed me your stinky feet and spit on me too if you want. serious only. i'm white, 30s, discrete, clean
May 06, 2006
Talk About "Smear The Queer"
PIE ME - 37
Smash a cream pie in my face. Rip my shirt off. Dump gunge over my head...oatmeal, applesauce, milk, syrup. Tie me up naked. Humiliate me in front of your buds. Hose me down. Looking for Hot fun guys into messy fun. Here are internet pix to give you some idea what I like. I'm 5'10, white, brown hair/eyes, handsome, stocky, cleancut, big dick.
May 05, 2006
Horse My Bitch Up
Horse COCK PLEASEEE
any one has a horse ?I can make the hors cum and you atch or join.
May 04, 2006
And Definitely No FAGS
Aggressive Buff Hot Sex Animal - 25
Sexy bisexual shaved head looking for a down white male that needs it rough. Only looking for 100 percent white so NO JEW or MIXED (Just a preference. I am not racist. White nationalism and pride is not racism. JUST PROUD OF MY PEOPLE AND WHAT I AM LIKE EVERY ONE ELSE)
May 03, 2006
Even *This* Guy Won't Kiss a Smoker
Uncut? Raunchy? Slimy? Cheesy? Never or seldom wash it?
Let me service you REGULARLY. Also available for bondage and full toilet service, and need horse hung guys (small groups ++) to throat and ass fuck my virgin holes, selfishly use me any way that turns you on.
Looking for uncut dicks that are never or seldom washed. Age, race, size unimportant as long as your foreskin is really raunchy. Used to service a guy weekly who NEVER cleaned his dick. It would have everything on it from his wife's slime, his buddy's ass slime, spit, cheese, dried cum and piss....god how I loved to worship his dick, take his piss and even clean his ass which he seldom fully cleaned. He also loved to spit on my face and in my mouth (including well-chewed food) and he had the filthiest mouth.
Blacks, Mexicans, other ethnics (and groups) a plus, but want them all. If you want to feed it through a glory hole, fine. Just be disease free and a non-smoker.
May 02, 2006
M/D seeks BBW PhD for NSA, P.D.Q.
Apparently BBW
...is not a type of post-doctoral qualification. Eight-stone male dufus (42) seeks urgent help with redefining most of his life’s assumptions.
May 01, 2006
Wicked Bro!!!
Really Dig a Guy Who Knows How to Throw a Wicked Face Fucking
Cool, laid back guy here with awesome oral skills.
Looking for a guy who's horny to hold the back
of my head and pump a load down my bottomless deepthroat.
Really dig a who knows how to throw a wicked face fucking.
Nice guy here, 35, clean cut, collegiate looks.
Italian Irish, masculine, blonde brown thick head
of hair to grab onto and ride.
5'8" and husky build. like a linebacker.
Looking for a horny guy, under 45, who wants to swing
by my place in Santa Monica now.
You be, clean, discreet and ready to go.
Hit me back with your stats and a pic and we'll see
if we can get into a little trouble.